Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Letting The Past Go

That was me on i-84 eastbound just after troutdale and somewhere before Multnomah falls on Sunday. Me with the hood up on the el camino, my beloved EL-C, you in your fancy, new, high efficiency, gutless wonder giving you a "new car smell" high because your all sealed in huffing plastic, glue and fumes that aren't in American built muscle cars and listening to some fancy lad euro boy band.

It goes like this, last week I found $10 under an empty 40 at the park. I saved the cash and decided to get a decent breakfast at the truck stop before heading to hood river for the first real cross race. When i hit the road I gunned it for old times sake on the on ramp and blew a head gasket in the vehicle i've loved longer than any woman has loved me.

Alot went through my head while i waited for the AAA truck and I watched racers go past with cross bikes ontop of there cars. Every one of you bastards looked like a 4-wheeled fist giving me the bird with your skinny seat and extra long seat post sticking out of your carbon fiber cross bike.

I guess i'll sell the EL-C to my girlfriends step son. He's young enough to think that car is cool again, dumb enouhg to buy a car that don't run and ugly enough to have time to fix it because the girls are all scared away by the poor rat's acne.

Thursday, September 20, 2007


Gettin up early to train is starting to wear on ol Muddy. I barely did it this AM, but did it I did. I get to Powell Butte just after sunrise and find $10 next to an empty 40 of Olde English. Sweet!

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Kruger Dudes Farm

Holly Crap! After the race, I took the ;lady for burgers and ice cream. Forgot to wash my face and looked like hell. BUt did I eat. Dang! Got back to the casa around 9, showered and passed out. Got up at nearly noon and ate like a horse again.

I gotta give a shout out to Brooke Hoyer who's website is cool, informational and he answers my questions. -something other dudes haven't done. when i learn how, i'll set my blog so dudes can click to go see his sight. That is if anyone reads this.

I was leary of a cross race with no barriers. All this fettish with being Belgian makes me scratch my head. Do Belgians wish they were from Jersey or LA? Who knows. But the race was good. Brookes advice to try Masters 35+C is my new goal. I'm gonna work my way up from moron to beat on the younger guys -even if it kills me.

Cyclocross is alot different than it was in 1982 but it still EFFIN RULES!

Friday, September 14, 2007


It's cooler now. Overcast and smells like rain. I'm fired up so I go do my run around glendoveer golf course but this time I mix it up by carrying my bike on the shoulder for the loop. The hole time I'm dodging fat ladies who keep yelling at me that bikes aren't allowed at glendoveer!

I'm friggin' carrying it! WTF?

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Heat Wave

How is it that I search the web for cross pics to get fired up, I buy tires based on how they'll track in the mud and clothes that will keep me warm in a fall/winter sport, but I'm out jogging in 90+ heat? THis is Bullcrap man! I want some rain, some mud and some epic cross racin'. The only good part of all this heat wave BS is the ladies jogging in Forest Park while I'm riding back into town. When the Van Halen is blasting in my headphones and the ladies jogging by are "semi-good lookin' " I'm feelin good!


Sunday, September 9, 2007

Jogging as Training

I've read plenty of other dudes blogs about going from riding all summer to running as prep for 'cross. I'll skip the crap everyone already said about being slow and sore. Too many wussies as far as I can tell.

I go downtown to the fancy running store for a good pair of shoes. I'm ready to shell out for this because I haven't bought a pack of Marlboros in a long freakin' time. I haven't been playing keno at Dotty's or gambling on line since before the double bypass. I've got a little scratch to get back into this cyclocross game.

So the kid at the running shop says my feet are flatter than the Woodburn drag strip. According to him I need these super supportive running shoes that look more like something old people wear. The only saving grace is that they still have laces and not giant velcro straps but orthopedic shoes are orthopedic shoes no matter how you look at it. The kid had me do some jogging in front of the store which got me a little winded. I'll hand it to him though, the shoes feel good. I count those three laps infront of the store as my first day of jogging for cross.

So yesterday I hit Glendoveer at sunrise to do my jog. It's 2 miles around and all soft dirt. I borrowed my girl-friends step son's I-pod and rocked out to Greenday for the 30-minutes it took me to get around the golf course. I learned a couple things yesterday:

#1 I'm slow as I am old
#2 2 miles is a long friggin way to jog
#3 Next pay day I'm buying my own ipod. That thing is friggin awesome. You can actually mix songs from different bands and albums without having to take forever like the old mix tapes. What will they think of next?

enuogh for now,


P.S. To whoever posted the comment about hanging at the A-crop; your a wussie and an idiot. There's better clubs in gresham.

Friday, September 7, 2007

The beginning

Here it is finally, Cyclocross season. It's been a few years since I learned to braze canti posts on my Bianchi and raced Surf City back when Tillford was just starting his legacy, Malone was ending his and Knickman was too young to drink the champaigne he won at Natz up at UCSC.

That of course was before the curses of this world sucked me in. A conversation with mortality put me on the straight and narrow. I'm clean, sober and tobacco free 2 years now and ready for cross!